Weird, my friends and I may occasionally talk about the bad stuff, but there’s always something good going on. We can be excited for upcoming things too.
I like being able to have conversations at bars and restaurants. In my bachelor days when I was dating an amazing person she knew all the good bars and restaurants that you could actually have conversations in. We always knew going in to a social thing if it was gonna be a good conversation or just yelling and “what?”
Plus the ear damage from the loud shit is no joke. Tinnitus started for me by mid 30s and I never listen to loud music or do stupid stuff, beyond bars and parties.
I know a guy who removed his motorcycle’s muffler and rode around for a couple of days. He can’t really hear in his right ear much anymore (because that’s where the pipe was cut off, to the right of the bike.) I did ride for a time, but always wore earplugs even if I wasn’t going on the highway.
I don’t really like large crowds or bars either man. I like 1:1 conversations and interactions. My heavy bar scene and parties only lasted maybe a couple years and I was always a +1.
My wife took me to a wedding where her cousin was getting married and the volume was cranked to 11. I sat through a two hour catholic service before the party which was fine. We got to the party afterwards and I just wanted to go back to the room and sleep. We were traveling, I was sick from what I thought was the food or having some of the local water but it later turned out to be full blown covid… but I was trying to be supportive and there for her because her enormous extended family was just meeting me for the first time.
I was in line for food since we hadn’t eaten, and the speakers were to my right. The noise was so loud you couldn’t hear someone yelling “what” at point blank range. I only stood in that line for a minute before leaving and my wife gave me so much shit for leaving, even though it was after her own father left. I wouldn’t be surprised if some or even most of my tinnitis came from that one party. I’ve never told her about this suspicion though, but I still remember it as I notice my ears ringing, right now. The right is substantially worse than the left.
Anyway, fortunately the tinnitus is extremely mild and I generally don’t notice it. If I start thinking about it, it gets worse and very persistent until I manage to distract myself. It’s always there, pulsating to the beat of my heart, and will not go away until I die or go deaf.